Luther unloads


WASHINGTON, D.C. – Former President Barrack Obama is facing a backlash from the Free Stuff wing of the Democratic Party after urging the party’s presidential hopefuls to avoid “crazy stuff” and take positions that are “rooted in reality.”

Obama was speaking to a group of wealthy Democrat donors and was accompanied by Luther, his former anger translator from the “Key and Peele” show. As the former president calmly made his case against going too far left, Luther clarified what Obama was really trying to say.

“Medicare FOR ALL? Free college FOR ALL? A thousand dollars a month FOR ALL? Have you lost your damn minds?” Luther bellowed. “How y’all gonna pay for that when all the billionaires are gone? Any by the way, we finally got four black billionaires and now you want to demonize the club? Hell no!”

After a few more words from Obama about being pragmatic, Luther lost it.

“I obviously don’t want to endorse Joe Biden – good man but dim bulb – BUT I WILL!. Y’all talk about being ‘woke.’ Well, wake up to this, bleeperbleepers. If you don’t get your bleepin’ bleep together, Hillary just might jump in. And then we’re totally bleepin’ bleeped – again.”

None of that sat well with supporters of Democratic presidential candidates Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Left of Center) and Sen. Bernie Sanders (D-Left of Lenin) . “Rooted in reality? Shame on Obama,” scoffed a barista wearing an ElizaBernie 2020 tee-shirt. “That’s nothing more than a Republican talking point.”

Brad Broberg


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